"the girl with the broken smile.."

"look for the girl with the broken smile,
ask her if she wants to stay a while.."

yes.i'd bet the world that you know this song.it's pretty old actually but it's been my theme song for the past few days just because of that line.my grandmother has a guideposts subscription as well as one to readers digest.anyway, Guideposts has an annual essay writing contest for teens about the trials they've experienced.lola said i should join because the prize is a full college scholarship.so i read the essays of the past winners.and i changed my mind about joining.

they lived tough lives.but their lives are now..patched up again.i mean, yeah, my life is patched up again.i mean, it's awesome that my stepmom is fabulous. that's a real blessing but the worst outcome of my mother's death was my grandparents' behavior. most of the past winners had divorced or deceased parents but no nagging grandparents. and lola told me that after i write my essay, i should show it to her before we send it. oh boy. show her an essay that contains some really bad stuff about her?not cool.so i guess i can't join.

first of all, because i don't want her to read it.second of all,it would have been better if i joined the essay without writing about granma troubles.but it said to write about troubles.and that's one of my major problems that unfortunately..still isn't over.*sigh*

and i was planning on writing about smiling despite problems, because people say that smiling is something i got from my real mom..and when i write that essay, and lola reads it, she'll think i'm living a happy life.you know i can lie.but i don't want to write an essay full of lies just so she will think i love her a lot.so i'm NOT joining.but i will write an essay.no one will ever get to read it.that's all.

and again..

"look for the girl with the broken smile,
ask her if she wants to stay a while.."

luv reg

pluggers: ARYAN,SANDRA,MICO,OSHEAN,CARS,KEVIN,ATE JO,SHE
miss ko na ang mga ito:johanna,pen,chong karlu,kimi